All right all you ORANGE Alligator Adventurers...It's time to start getting excited about our forthcoming adventure...In an effort to increase anticipation, I thought I'd hearken back to several ORANGE Alligator Adventures of the past to give you a sense of what is in store for you should you choose this adventure...
Scenario 1: The Outhouse
You step into a darkened biffy to change from your shorts into pants. You notice an odd smell but laugh to yourself as you remind yourself that you're in a Port-a-Potty. You shimmy out of your shorts carefully in the tiny space utilizing your sweet new flip-flops purchased for the adventure when suddenly you halt in complete terror. Your flip-flop has just left a bit of debris on your leg of unknown origin. Your brain works quickly to devise a response. If you choose to run screaming from the outhouse, turn to page 4. If you quietly exit the outhouse with a look of disgust barely contained, turn to page 8. If you turn on your headlamp to illuminate the debris, extract your science kit from your back pocket, take samples of the substance to ascertain it's origin, and upon discovery exit the outhouse to excitedly share your discovery with fellow adventurers, turn to page 11.
Scenario 2: The Sandstorm
You've pitched your tent for the evening, carefully staking the edges of your tent into the soft sand on the island. The sounds of the sea from beyond the sand dune lulls you to a comfortable sleep in your sleeping bag. The muscle relaxers you've taken helped too. Suddenly you're awoken by the sound of a sandstorm that's just blown in, whipping the rain fly on your tent into a frenzy every five seconds and pushing the sides of the tent onto your head making you imagine that the islands wild horses are trying to step on your head. Each time the rain fly rises into the air, the wind whips bits of the sand island into the mesh of the tent creating a pitter patter of debris on your sleeping bag. You realize a sleepless night is imminent unless you take immediate action. If you choose to get up and attempt to re-stake your tent into the swirling sands of the island, turn to page 14. If you choose to speak commandingly to the storm reminiscent of Jesus' calming of the storm, turn to page 19. If you pull out your foam "F" and recognize the Futility of all efforts to sleep despite the fact that the muscle relaxers have made you unable to open your eyes, turn to page 21.
Scenario 3: The Strawberries
You've discovered a delightful roadside stand touting "Pick Yer Own" Strawberries and you decide to pull over and take them up on this charming offer. Your eyes glance quickly around the roadside stand to confirm that no curmudgeonly old man with a pair of binoculars will be spying on you through a trap door while you're picking to ascertain if you're making a light snack of the patch while picking. You spy no such old fuddy duddy and so choose to pick an enormous batch of strawberries (you practice a "pick-one-eat-one" light snacking mentality). After paying for your strawberries, you drive off, not realizing that the strawberries you've just slaved over are sitting in a bag on the roof of your car. Upon reaching critical speeds, you suddenly see the bag and it's bits of red gold flying off behind your car. If you keep driving, leaving the berries to get smushed by cars, and whispering a quiet "oh well, no strawberry shortcake at the campfire tonight", turn to page 27. If you turn around and drive the 40 miles back to the strawberry stand to pick more berries, turn to page 30. If you immediately whip a U-turn, return to the scene, grab the strawberries that have miraculously remained in the bag, chase off the giant ravens attempting a light midday snack on the strawberries strewn across the road, and carefully pick up each mangled berry just so you can have strawberry shortcake at the campfire that night and strawberries in your yogurt in the morning, turn to page 36.
Perhaps these specific scenarios don't particularly interest you...but they should because it's quick decisions in situations like these that make or break your adventures...so choose carefully and join us in this delightful third installment of the ORANGE Alligator Adventure Series.
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